Cernine

[Cernine]

[lazulisong]

time to HALT!

(i learned this in a caregiving class but it's useful in most situations i've been in, like not to be neurodivergent on main but sometimes you feel Bad and can't work out why)

Hungry? eat something*.

Angry? count to ten, take a deep breath, and walk away from it if you can.

Lonely? interact with another person that you aren't responsible for.

Tired? take five minutes to sit with your eyes closed.

also i bet your drink is going cold.

( ˘ ³˘)♥

*(if you're not allergic, a spoonful of nut butter and a glass of liquid will keep you going, but the only bad calorie is the one you don't have when you need it.)

[Cernine]

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

"salad dressing" don't be so pretentious it's sauce. it's salad sauce

[toffyrats]

uhuh and then what’s ketchup

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

burger sauce next question

[Cernine]

[warszawawa]

Hi everyone. This is my friend’s cat Luigi!

As you can see he’s broken his leg and tore all the ligaments surrounding the break. Our options right now are either amputation or surgery. Since it is his back leg amputation would cause him a lot of problems, but the surgery is upwards of $2000 so we’re scrambling to scrape the money together. He has a consultation with the surgeon on Wednesday and he needs it to be performed within the week to avoid complications. If anyone has anything to spare you can send it to my friend’s cashapp $ariellekv or my PayPal @/ratbabiee.

If you can’t help out financially you can also help us by sharing and boosting.

Please help us get this poor baby his surgery.

[Cernine]

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

i think that in small tightknit communities, all residents should receive a coupon book on their bday that allows them to commit [x] number of nonviolent crimes per year

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

"tsk tsk the Johnson boy is breaking into the cemetery to perform Midnight Rituals again" "oh leave the boy alone he just had a birthday"

"but MOM why can i go with my friends to break into the old haunted saw mill?" "well jason you should have thought of that before you before you graffitied ACAB on the side of the police station" "but MOM it was an act of political protest" "i know sweetie and i respect your freedom of expression, but the fact remains you used your last coupon. no trespassing in abandoned factories until you turn 17" "but MOOOOOMMMM" "sweetheart ur bday is in 7 weeks pls chill ur ass'

[Cernine]

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

team *apologizing aloud to inanimate objects after accidentally knocking them over*

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

team *hissing at jars would you WORK with me PLEASE when the lids refuse to open*

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

*bumping into the same table leg for the 3rd time today* we have TALKED about this babe

[Cernine]

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

sometimes nb stands for nonbinary and sometimes nb stands for None of your damn Business

[Cernine]

[pukicho]

I think there should be levels to the death penalty. Like if u kill one guy, then you just get lethal injection or whatever, but if you kill 30 guys, which is pretty bad, you get shot out a canon whilst silly circus music plays in the background. 

[Cernine]

[jojo-phase]

SDC + text posts take 2 🌟

[Cernine]

[jojo-phase]

someday I’ll run out of text posts for making these, but today is not that day

[Cernine]

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

babygirl i am literally in pain over how you

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

im sleepy & couldnt think of a punchline so i just clicked reblog

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

no wait babygirl i am literally in pain over how you perceive the human condition as defined by the suffering of flesh wherein i perceive life as worthwhile and reverent by the sheer existence of moment-to-moment joy and also the promise of the life-loving the future is certain at some moment however rare to deliver